He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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