Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
