Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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