If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
