Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
