Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
