Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I'm just crazy horny about you
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
