What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
