So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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