the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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