your parents love me but you hate me
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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