This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
sarcasm needs its own font
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
