just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
