I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
