Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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