Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
