you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
