your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
