We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
