my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize