If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize