I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
