Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
