where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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