1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
