Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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