i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
