Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
