i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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