I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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