I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
