ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
