Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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