dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
