Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize