Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
