Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
