ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
