he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Randomize
