didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
