is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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