Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
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