U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Randomize
