just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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