big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize