I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
