Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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