Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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