I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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