I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
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